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Anti-Fragile Parenting 🌳

By Joe Lu


I was a rather strict parent.


I am a really fun dad, but I can’t be fun when I’m around kids that are disrespectful.


When I see kids disrespecting others it bothers me almost as much as when adults do it. 😤


So I always made clear with my daughter's friends during birthdays or when they would come over for play dates that they needed to always be kind and respectful.


That was it.


They could stay up late, jump on the bed, eat what they want, make forts out of the furniture, leave their room in a complete mess (with the door closed) and whatever else they felt a mind to do … but that needed to be kind and respectful of other people.


I sent kids home after a single warning more than once.


I also took the time to talk to the parents about what happened at length…because that is what I would have wanted.


When the kids were little this worked great!


As the kids got older, it seemed parents got more defensive...like someone was judging them, or implying their kid was "bad" instead of what my parents and everyone on my block understood to simply be a "mistake".


Turns out there is something of an epidemic going on with parents allowing kids to believe whatever they want.


Everyone gets to believe their own reality.


Everyone gets a participation trophy.


Always let your kid win or they will lose confidence.


Really?


If you want your kids to become confident...help them learn how to face mistakes, say they are sorry, and grow from adversity.


Don't treat kids like they are so fragile that you have to believe their version of reality or else they are going to kill themselves.


Kids are anti-fragile ... like muscles 💪


They grow stronger the same ways trees grow tall 🌳 by reaching for the sun ☀️ even when the wind blows 🌬️


If you want your kids to be fragile you have to work at it.


Treat them like they are incapable, and keep them hidden from reality until they leave the house..like a potted plant that has never felt the changing weather.


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